Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
