what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
There's always time for handjobs
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Randomize
