it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Randomize
