You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
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