Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Randomize
