haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
