is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize
