So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
Randomize