I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
