This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Randomize
