Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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