tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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