Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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