once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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