I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
