You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Randomize
