We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
