Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
