We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Randomize
