I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
