maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
