He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Randomize
