she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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