She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
