I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
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