I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
