Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
