if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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