Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Randomize
