My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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