you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Randomize
