He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
