You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
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