So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
