I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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