I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
