i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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