People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
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