ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
I love you. Go after that dick
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
