he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Randomize
