I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
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