Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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