Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
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