Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
only you would photoshop your dick
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
