He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
either way he was missing a nipple.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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