farters have to be the big spoon...
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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