LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
This baby is an asshole
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
