You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
It's blow job season.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
