I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
