he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
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