Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
